brokebitch scenerio #15 a negative + a nagative = negative. a negative + positive = positve balance

(me and my friend Sonya, I dedicate this entry to her!)
I didn't pay attention in math class..too busy daydreaming about being a star...but I think a negative + a positive = a positive. Regardless of what pointless mathematicians say, I've proven it to be true. Two weeks ago, my friend/landlord called to tell me she rented her condo to someone else. Oh and I had 13 days to get out. heart. stopped. tears flooded ducts.

After consulting a seasoned landlord, she legally can't give me 13 days notice. Being the brokebitch I panicked about moving at such a short time frame. Hell, all I planned to do in that two week time span was work 100 + hours. Moving should be a breeze!

I sold some things I could live without. I heart craigslist. However my former landlord, lets call her "beeeyatch" for short, refused to give me my deposit back. So, I had to find more money to pay a deposit down on my new place! All the hectic moving left me offline unable to check my bank account. Yep. $1.32 cost me an overdraft fee of $35.00 x 4! That's math I definitely don't wanna get! $140. wtf.

Here's the good part of the story. My friend Sonya went to the bank and they say according to one of the new Obama administration laws, banks can't charge $35.00 for less than an overdraft of $5. That's an ah ha moment! The charges have been reversed.

I also WOmanned up and refused to pay $49 for my gym membership(yoga keeps me out of cookoo territory, for the most part)I broke it off with my gym today. I deserve a better rate. My life is gonna be what I MAKE of it! They are now charging me $30.

I ordered Victoria's Secret on my VS card. It didn't arrive. I called. They credited my account and gave me a gift card for $15. Hello...dicounted boob enhancement. Thanks Vicky.

when I knew last week I couldn't spend money as my bank account was in limbo, I decided I had to win a contest at Clinique. Whomever made 10 makeover appointments would be able to go shopping on Clinique. It was like a diabetic at a candy store. I would be a winner if it killed me! I won't let the bank...the beeeyatch or my critics win! I won. Hello...mr happy perfume...total turnaround(kind of goes with my week, right)and good bye wrinkles with youth surge! $150 in makeup!!! Tammy Faye was smiling down on me. YEP...I'M A WINNER!(The best part, I'll make money from the appointments, win win)

While I did get into the fetal position multiple times last week...I refused to let the negative win. However, it has left me to think my life is bipolar. I'm sure they make a medicene for that? Oh wait, they do, hello mr. adult beverage.


~MM